Amazon Boxes Now Legal House Building Material

For some Santa has come early this year, as the new low cost home building law began last Tuesday at 12pm. For others, a serious of complex emotions are welling up as D.C. publishes another serious of mind boggling laws.

Skeptics are bewildered, “A perfect storm of relaxed regulations and Christmas season’s confusing amount of Amazon boxes. The familiar boxes are now considered legitimate home building material. It only takes a few hours to build a shack, so there’s already whole neighborhoods going up.”

A Whitehouse advisor states:
“We were able to hit three liberal birds with one stone:
1. cheap housing
2. recycling
3. gaslighting ‘solution’

Liberals are in fact steamed, “We were going for cheap housing for our renewed platform, as very strong talking points. We could have played that out for decade, even without doing much about it, because red tape, you know,” said the California representative who wished to be unnamed. “We didn’t talk about skyrocketing housing prices for Biden’s entire four years, literally saving it as the last ‘holy hand grenade’ if we ever needed it. If we can build houses this cheaply now, then the Republicans are going to get all the credit. And for what? Box houses?”

Small Shanty Town created in a week

“You should be able to build a house out of whatever you want,” said Libertarian Matt Benshaw, “I’m using the new law to build an in-law house. That drippy shack will keep the visits brief, just how I like them.”

We took a visit to local recycling facility, among reports of turmoil, and in open view we saw some demographics have taken to the streets, not to riot, but to steal Amazon boxes. Among them, eBay flippers looking to sell bundles of the boxy building materials, as well as the usual suspects.

“I dindu nuffin,” yelled one man, as he ran by with two armloads of boxes.

Drone footage has collected row after row of carboard shanty towns, full blown suburban neighborhoods, and even hybrid mansions expanded with the help of Amazon Boxes alone. “We’re just not sure what this is going to do to housing prices. It’s going to be pretty hard to rip people off if they can build a house in 3-4 days.”

Large Mansion Enhanced with Cardboard Box Additions