Coca Cola and Pepsi Merge Recipes

The two soda giants have merged their classic recipes into one drink. “The result is a new drink called Port Deuce. It honestly tastes like s#it,” said one reviewer. “It’s like the company boards of both brands drink way too much soda, their taste buds accept a pure flow of corn syrup and various sweet acids running over their tongues, regardless of flavor.”

Another reviewer says: “If I wanted to my tongue to be dumped on, I’d do it myself.”

Another online review: “Tastes like a combination of gutter water, chocolate, and some kind of tingly sugar substance; it actually makes the tongue sizzle a little.”

Dental Groups have issued a warning: “Drinking Port Deuce will cause fillings to pop out, and tooth breakage. It magnifies enamel corrosion. Each sip is like 11 minutes of gargling battery acid.” The group shared time lapse video of an entire tooth eroding in just 17 Port Deuce drinking hours.