“Winning is my best look, never forget I’m a killer. The rematch will end in death,” said a 9 foot tall mecha Mike Tyson in a dimly lit, run-down hotel room. The look in Iron Mike’s eyes was different: there […]
“Senator Lincoln Demark speaks loudly and with absolute conviction. But, for an entire week we fact checked his statements from every angle. 98% of what he says is completely wrong. We tricked him into a psych assessment to see if […]
Jamall Bomeo has 9 foot long dreadlocks, bundled casually on top of his head. “It’s been that way for as long as I remember,” said his friend Razna Modavia. “I shave my head once a week, with a tight fade […]
“Meteorites can be quit valuable, and there are hunters who track them down. People travel to scan the soils where shooting star sightings have been reported. This week, a strange space rock made it to Earth. So many people had […]
The two soda giants have merged their classic recipes into one drink. “The result is a new drink called Port Deuce. It honestly tastes like s#it,” said one reviewer. “It’s like the company boards of both brands drink way too […]
“My job was to make the company as profitable as possible. It was a wild success. Sure, I had to take one for the team. We used an A.I. algorithm to auto-deny as many requests as possible. It removes the […]
“The new app is a train wreck. And anyone can see that when you pick a song for a new playlist, the app forces our recommendations onto your playlist. Those songs pay the record labels most. This helps put food […]
“I thought it was an error, but it was Friday right before the bank closed. I think the adjuster stamped the loan with the wrong stamper,” said Brian Jells, loan officer. “But, I just kept my mouth shut cuz the […]
“I just want to see if it moves the rings a little. Just a little side project for fun. The bomb we’ll be sending has a payload similar to 60,000 Nagasaki’s. It could literally melt half the Earth.” While the […]
Excessive moshing in the ‘Napalm Lords’ metal concert led to an unexpected results: “I guess the collisions just added up in the mosh pit, the headbangers actually caused subatomic shifting, an unknown type of atomic reaction started to happen; sizzling […]
