Tooth Regrowing Serum

Japan may be on the verge of a cure to tooth loss. Subcultures weigh in on possibilities of tooth growing medication.

While intrinsic tooth repair could really help the general public, it turns out alternative subcultures wait with anticipation, some wanting more than just a broken tooth regrown. We went to an underground tattoo and piercing shop and asked what they thought:

“Can I get 3 inch snake fangs that retract and fold out?”

“I want a full blown Jaws mouth. 3 rows of razor sharp teeth.”

“I wanna look cute, so instead of four upper front teeth, I want two huge chicklets.”

“I lost all my teeth from meth and not brushing. I’ve always want to get back to those two pastimes, now I can!”

After airing these reviews, the Japanese lab is now trying to over-engineer the medicine with special backstops, so that snake fangs and Jaws mouth are not possible. The head of the lab speaks, “We want to help people, not make monsters that scare little children. Chicklet teeth are weird, but fine.”